Americans Are Starting to Feel Tipping Fatigue

Think of the last time you got food or coffee. Chances are, modern technology played a role in that interaction. The sales clerk likely let you insert your card, then flipped a screen asking you how much you’ll be tipping and if you’d like a receipt.

There was a time years ago when you’d just receive a paper receipt; it wasn’t an option. Most of those just get tossed, so it was likely a welcome change. More recently, the touch-to-tip option was introduced. In some scenarios, this is a simpler way to complete a transaction, but it also presents restaurants with a new opportunity to earn some money.

Of course, Americans are used to tipping, but it feels like we’ve been asked to do it more frequently and in higher percentages. As more places are adding tipping into their standard checkout process, customers are getting exhausted. It feels like everyone is asking for more money, customers are paying more, but products and experiences haven’t changed.

Why Do Americans Tip So Much?

The short answer, or at least the version that pertains to your life, is that we always have and it’s become expected. It’s so common that the federal minimum wage for a tipped employee is $2.13, rather than the standard $7.25, because businesses assume that they’ll receive the difference in tips. Without tips, that full-time employee would make around $340 a month, so they truly need those tips.    

Of course, this federal regulation is going to get the American treatment. Only 16 states actually pay tipped employees the federal minimum, and the other states set their own standards. Some have a higher tipped minimum while others pay all employees the same minimum wage. With all the variations, it can get very tricky.

As the customer, it’s not your job to understand these regulations, but it is your responsibility to tip. At least, you think it is. If you’re a decent person you’ll add some money to your bill because you want your server to earn more than $2.13 an hour.

But if the answer really is that we’ve always tipped so much, why are people now feeling the fatigue?

Why Are People So Bothered?

If you ask a non-American about spending money in the USA, they’re likely to be confused by the concepts of tipping and taxing. While calculating taxes is fairly easy once you understand the concept, tipping is less uniform. Usually, the guidance is some type of ambiguous sentiment like “be generous” or an oddball calculation rooted in bro science. In daily life, this can get quite exhausting.

We don’t know what’s expected

If you go to a restaurant, you know you’re expected to leave a tip, but how much? There isn’t a firm answer, regardless of what your friend tells you.

According to Emily Post (the etiquette guide) 15% pre-tax is OK, but Eater suggests that 20% should be the standard at a sit-down restaurant. Sometimes, restaurants provide their own suggestions, but they won’t necessarily adhere to these formulas.

To complicate matters even further, the pandemic made tipping even less uniform. In the early stages, it seems people recognized that restaurants were struggling. Servers were seeing fewer customers, and there was an inherent risk to serve and deliver food. Customers felt compelled to be generous so their favorite spots would be open at the end of lockdowns.

Now, restrictions have mostly tapered off, but the restaurant experience isn’t the same. Many menus are digital, there are more sanitation precautions, and 25% might be the new standard for tipping.

We all know standards change with time, but the restaurant business has transformed a lot in a short period. If you’ve been paying the bill for over a decade, it feels like 20% was a generous tip, then it was average, and now it’s mediocre?

Restaurants just expect it

So what happens if you just choose not to tip? Nothing, there’s really no consequence. You might get bad service if you return to the restaurant or encounter the same server, but if you’re skipping the tip, you’re probably not concerned about your next experience.

Yet most people would never skip the tip entirely at a sit-down restaurant. They might reduce the tip a little for terrible service, but they’d still leave something for the server. Meanwhile, tip jars at to-go restaurants had some merits. People only put money in there if the service was exceptional.

But no one carries cash to throw into the tip jar, not before the pandemic and certainly not after. When people pay with a digital kiosk like Toast, Clover, and Square, the digital tip jar gets thrown in your face.

Restaurants have the power to make suggested tip amounts, and you have to interact with the screen. If you’re getting a $4 cup of coffee, you’ll need to add a couple of dollars on top of it or physically push “no tip” in front of the cashier.

Now, the tip jar that I could easily ignore is a mandatory step in the transaction. I certainly understand the change in tech, but this doesn’t just feel transactional. The forced interaction with these screens feels like an attempt to change etiquette.

As a customer, I’m a bit confused. Is a 25% tip at a coffee shop expected? Is it OK to not leave a tip? Or have I always been in the wrong for leaving the tip jar empty?

It’s unspoken

Perhaps the most frustrating thing about tipping is the fact that there isn’t clear etiquette, and it’s taboo to ask about it.

At least at sit-down restaurants, it’s clear that you should tip something. In other scenarios, it can feel like a guessing game. So if someone suggests that you should tip, many people feel that pressure and throw down a few dollars before risking the faux pas.

Sometimes, it’s not even about the money. If you need to pay, so be it. Just make it clear; not every interaction needs to be a game.

Was It the Pandemic?

While the pandemic changed a lot in the restaurant industry, digital kiosks were being used for payments and tips prior to 2020. Many restaurants were already using these tablets, but the pandemic accelerated growth toward digital trends. In 2019, they were commonplace; by 2022 they’ve become standard.

Certainly, the pandemic influenced our tipping habits, but the shift toward digital payments was bound to happen over time. It can be more convenient for restaurants, but it has also presented them with opportunities. Of course, businesses are going to try to make money, and the pandemic resulted in a universal concern for profits.

You can blame a lot on the events of 2020, but all it did was accelerate inevitable changes for restaurants.

Why Tipping Fatigue Is Real

A lot has changed over the past few years. Businesses have struggled, but they’re not the only ones. People have made a lot of sacrifices, but now that we’re approaching a sense of normalcy, two years of changes to the service industry emerge in one cumulative bomb.

Now, everyone is feeling the pain of inflation. Restaurants are, servers are, and customers are. So the restaurants charge more for food, tipping expectations have increased, and the customer is expected to absorb all of the burden. While people may have been empathetic during the start of the pandemic, emotions wane over time. We might feel bad for restaurants, but the struggle in 2022 isn’t the same as 2020.

Here’s the funny thing about the pandemic: we know restaurants struggled, but we also know we don’t need them. If restaurants push too hard, people won’t come back. Food costs might go up, but it’s still much cheaper at a grocery store than at a restaurant.

Nobody is saying servers shouldn’t be paid a living wage, and right now, that means tipping. We also need to acknowledge that they’re only one side of the equation. Nobody wants to be put into an awkward situation, and tipping isn’t known for its transparency. When expectations keep changing, people will start avoiding uncomfortable situations.

As people become more concerned with money, they won’t simply skip the tip; they’ll skip the restaurant altogether. An extra dollar or two might seem minor now, but as inflation creeps in from all angles, luxuries like dining out will be the first to go. The businesses that factor the customer into their equation will be the ones who survive.